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Refugees at “The Oasis”

It was close to 10:30 pm as Matt’s cell phone rang.  Since he was out of the room brushing his teeth or something, I picked up the phone from his bedside table and answered it.  “Hello?”  “Hi, how are you?  You doing good?” answered the male, non-native English speaker on the other end.  “Who’s this?” I asked, a little leery.  “You don’t know me.  I am in Italy.  I have phone number for Austria.”  Click.  I hung up without saying anything else, annoyed and convinced it was a prank call.  As Matt walked into the room the phone started ringing again.  “I’ll let you answer that,” I said, “A crazy person is calling you.”  Matt answered the phone, his brow furrowed as he listened to the person on the other end.  Walking out of the room, I heard Matt say, “Yes, I remember you.”  “Oh, it’s someone Matt knows,” I thought, “Now I’m pretty embarrassed about rudely hanging up.”

A few minutes later, Matt returned to tell me about the conversation.  It was a man he had met a few weeks before at the Oasis refugee ministry.  At the time, the two of them had had a long conversation about God and Matt had given this man his business card.  Amazingly, through the broken English, Matt was able to understand that this man had not received asylum status in Austria, so had taken the chance to travel to Italy to look for work.  There were no jobs to be found for an illegal immigrant in Italy, so he had pulled out Matt’s card, got a hold of a calling card to call internationally, and used the English that he knew to ask Matt if he was aware of anyone in Austria that would hire him (illegally).  Matt had to tell him no, he didn’t know of any jobs, and that we would pray for him.

As I sat there processing what I was hearing, I began to weep.  What a desperate situation this man was in!  It seemed like he was reaching out to Matt as a last-ditch effort before possibly getting sent back to his home country which he was fleeing.  And I was touched that God had used Matt to make an impact in this man’s life in just one conversation.  I wanted so badly to help this man, to be able to do something, but felt powerless.  “I wish we could do something,” I finally said aloud.  “But all we can do is pray,” I added, hopelessly.  As I heard my own words verbalized, the light bulb went on.  The first and best thing we can and should do for people is pray!  God doesn’t lack the power, creativity and resources to change a hopeless situation.  We’ve got to trust Him, to run to Him first with all of our worries, problems, and questions–in our lives and in the lives of others.  Ultimately, everyone’s biggest need, to be rescued from eternal separation from God, has been provided in Jesus for everyone who believes.  That gift of belief, or faith, requires the power of God to change human hearts.  We can trust the God who changes hearts to be able to provide all of the lesser things in this life as well.

So I rejoice that even when I can’t see how things could possibly work out, that I can do something.  I can go straight to the One who can help in all situations.  Thank YOU for laboring with us in prayer!

Naomi just started consistently walking a couple of weeks ago. I love the determined look on her face as she focuses on taking each step. Sometimes at home she just walks “laps” up and down the hall, around and around the living room. Once I think she did this for 20 minutes straight. Just enjoying walking. Granted, she usually has to be holding something at the same time, but she is focused on the walking. That’s a great picture of how I would like to live–simply walking with God and enjoying the journey.

I can get so discouraged when I look around for visible fruit of “my” investing in people. I start to think that I need to come up with the perfect words to speak to a person in a certain situation. That I need to make them see and understand how great it is to walk with God. That I need to see the fruit of my labors in order to make living and working here “worth it.” How prideful to think that I have any power in myself to change human hearts, or to think my agenda is more important than God’s! How prideful and demanding to want God to show me success in the way I define it, in order for me to be motivated to do what He has called me to do.

What makes everything worth it in this life is the privilege of getting to know Him more and more in every situation. I’m learning that the main thing He is calling me to do is to walk with Him! In the moments that I grasp this, it is very freeing. God is at work, and I can trust that. Only His Holy Spirit can change people. I praise Him that He’s changing me! This motivates me to pray for people and to love them as God works through me.

God wants my life be an example of His goodness, and I should first of all ask Him what He wants to teach me and change in me, not how He wants me to solve everyone’s problems. This continues to be very humbling for me. It’s not the kind of teaching that I had in mind! To really let people into my life means I let them see not only the things He has done, the victories He has won, but also the sin that He is currently cleaning up. Being honest with people by admitting I don’t have it all together, that I need God’s grace moment by moment, that I struggle with sin–this is painfully humbling to my self–but I know that it glorifies God.

So what is God wanting me to teach people? Nothing…that is, in my own strength. He wants me to humbly walk with Him and allow Him to work in me and through me–for His purposes, His glory, His agenda–and for His people.

BTCP weekend class at our apartment.

The thing I like most about Bible Training Center for Pastors (BTCP) is that it is more than just a class. The shortest track is at least 400 hours of class time. When you spend that much time together it’s less like a teacher-student relationship and more like a family. We have a couple of traditions that I particularly enjoy. We always start off class with prayer. Often I am tempted to cut this time short, but I am convinced that better work is done during this time than any amount of teaching I can do. Our other tradition…which is a fairly recent addition, is a Friday-Saturday class one weekend every three months. We do this to get in the occasional “sprint” into our learning marathon so that we don’t start lagging too far behind.We make something special out of it, opening up our home and having meals together. It’s a time of fellowship mixed with teaching and though they are a lot of work for me AND for Liz, we both have come to enjoy them.
I was preparing for our latest weekend class on Thursday when I got a call from one of the students. He had called to inform me that his job did not renew his contract and since his visa was dependent on his work he was likely to have to go home for good. I asked him how he felt and he told me he wasn’t sure, yet. I was only the second person that he had called. He seemed to have a peace about moving on, even though he had been here for the last seven years. I think the two things that he most regretted leaving behind was the church that he is pastoring and our class. I was touched by his encouraging words, as I never really knew how much our class time really meant to him.
I don’t say this to brag. I say this to say thank you, all of you, who read, pray, and give so that we can be here and share life with the people that God puts in our path. And if you think about it please be in prayer for my friend and the church that he pastors.

Adam and Kasey with Liz at a BBQ two years ago

For those of you who remember our team braved the cold for several hours at the beginning of the year to ensure a place in the visa line for our newest team members Adam and Kasey. This month Adam has gotten confirmation that he has been approved for his visa. Kasey‘s visa situation is still a bit in limbo. She had forgotten to sign her application which means she will need to come and resign it in person. Fortunately, though it sounds like she will still get it! The plan is that they will come with the Student Ministry team from Denton Bible Church and stay. Pray for them to get the rest of their support raised, and that all the details works out for Kasey’s visa when she gets here

My husband and I are celebrating four years of marriage this week. We’ve talked about how it now feels like we have a little bit of mileage behind us, although four years isn’t a long time. Just that we’re out of the newlywed stage now and are also learning to be parents. Man, that first 2 weeks of parenthood was SO rough! Sleep deprivation is a horrible thing! Yet in those first two weeks we had to work like a team like never before and I was so thankful to have help! I literally could NOT have survived those weeks without my husband. His voice of reason that contrasted my hormonally-messed-up mind and his ability to calmly problem-solve and come up with a plan were invaluable. It has been a joy and a source of pride to see how God has really helped Matt shine in his new role as a father.

I could go on and on about what a good father Matt is, and maybe I will in another post. In thinking about our four years of marriage, however, one of the things I appreciate most about my husband is how he has counseled me and pointed me towards the gospel. We are currently going through a course on how to counsel people biblically and I am learning the importance of listening well and asking good questions, neither of which I am good at. But these are things that Matt has done well for me, and through these acts of love, God has been changing me, helping me see the root sin issues that are the actual causes of why I act and react the way that I do to life (see James 4:1-10). Most of the time I don’t see the root sin immediately. In the moment I may react to Matt in an unloving way or just be “in a mood” and not sure myself what I am feeling and why. But through talking things out with Matt after some time, I am beginning to recognize my ungodly motivations and desires easier and quicker, and am able to ask myself some questions about my motivations and the condition of my heart.

The point is, I’ve found that when I recognize the root sin, and not just believe that the way I react to life is only the product of factors like emotions, stress, or circumstances, I can gain victory through Christ by confessing the sin (my heart attitude toward God) and allowing Him to work through me to put sin to death, as in the “put off and put on” passages (Ephesians 4:17-5:2; Colossians 3:1-17). I can actually get out of a rut of always reacting a certain way and not knowing why when I let God’s truth instruct me and then run to Him for help, instead of trying to improve myself in my own strength and not getting anywhere.

So what are the good questions Matt asks me while he listens? Mostly variations of, “What do you mean?”, as I share how I feel and he wants to clarify. Also, “what made you react by doing such and such and how were you hoping to solve things by that? He also re-states what I say to make sure he’s hearing me correctly or so that I can explain it better. Most of the time the result is that I realize that I am putting my “kingdom” above God’s kingdom, and when I don’t get what I want, I react in an ungodly way (see again James 4:1-10). So that’s a question I’m trying to start asking myself as I’m deciding how to react: “Whose kingdom am I focused on right now?” When I remember that God’s will in every situation is for me to be conformed to the image of Jesus (Romans 8:29), I’m better able to trust Him in the moment and act in a more God-glorifying way.

Proverbs 20:5 states, “The purpose in a man’s heart is like deep water, but a man of understanding will draw it out.” This is exactly what Matt does when he listens and it is such a blessing to me. As Matt and I continue on this journey together, I too want to grow in loving him by listening well and asking good questions. For a really helpful resource for your own personal reflection, check out David Powlison’s X-Ray Questions.